Poor Alfred, his snark goes unnoticed. And eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh, Bruce got shot and all he can think about is Clark and how he can't let Clark touch him for a while now. Priorities, Bruce!
Whether Bruce allows Alfred to talk him into using medication or not—either he'll be drugged, judgment in tatters, unfit for company, or else the pain will be dogging him with every step, every movement. Oh, Bruce. And Alfred! And Bruce. I love them so much. And Diana, too. You write her so wonderfully, calm and patient and wise and still so very no-bullshit. Also, I am ridiculous, but Alfred and Diana exchange a glance made me go :DDDDDD.
Having lied to Clark for weeks, months, and then telling him now, at the precise moment when he's most likely to feel like he owes Batman something; as if that bullet were a chip to bargain with, as if Clark's gratitude could be cashed in on. The thought alone puts a sick sour taste in the back of Bruce's throat. Oh, BRUCE. Any normal person would think this is a good moment, but not him, of course not. Bruce not wanting to let Clark forgive him because he knows he doesn't deserve it, even if Clark would be kind enough to do it. Man, this is wonderful, so twisted and fucked up, but it still makes sense in itself and it's so very Bruce. <3 And the ending of that first scene, ouch! Bruce thinking about "sacrificing" Bruce Wayne in all of this, making sure that Clark won't miss him, thinking about all of this like it's still a plan he's in any way in control of. And the beginning of the following scene is just so great, Bruce basically treating himself like some puppet following directions, playing a part he has to play.
AND IT'S JUST PHYSICALLY PAINFUL, BRUCE BEING ALL AWFUL TO CLARK IN HIS BRUCE WAYNE-Y WAY. D: My heart! Poor Clark. Especially with Clark trying so hard not to inconvenience or bother him.
"Look, it was nice for a while, okay? But this is starting to add up to more trouble than it's worth." Holy shit, Bruce, you're horrid. And the extremely enjoyable assets and BORING and OUCH. Bruce. :( And the more he says, the worse it gets. Wow, this is painful, even knowing that he doesn't mean it. Maybe even more so because he doesn't mean it.
(Forgiveness is what Bruce wants. He can admit that. But anger—anger's what he's earned. Anger is what's coming to him; and he has no one to blame but himself.) "Suit yourself," Bruce says easily, as if it makes no difference. NONNY, YOU'RE MAKING ME CRY. STOP MAKING ME CRY!
Clark stares at him like—like Bruce is someone he's never seen before, like he's found a stranger looking out at him from Bruce's face. NOOOOOOOOO, my heart! You're stomping all over it! And then this: "No. I think maybe I did." He takes one slow breath in, lets it out, and then says at a more normal volume, "Sorry for interrupting that phone call. I hope it wasn't too big an inconvenience." ALL OF THIS HURTS SO MUCH!
And, oh, plot twist! :D I love Bruce finding out things he needs to know while still being as obnoxiously Bruce Wayne about it as necessary.
"I'm going to tell you to please not ask me that," Bruce says, with a wink. "And one other thing, if you would: close your eyes." Bruuuuuuuuuuce. Now I'm just having a big fangirl moment here. :D Which was necessary to cheer me up after SO MUCH HEARTBREAK. This is utterly perfect. Just, wow. You really know how to break my heart into so many little pieces and I'm just so glad I know you're going to fix it again because THIS HURT SO MUCH. Bruce was so awful in such a perfect Bruce way because ~it needs to be done~. Ouch. I can't wait for the next part, I am so excited. :D /OP
Re: FILL: as to which may be the true; Bruce/Clark, identity porn (20/23ish?)
Whether Bruce allows Alfred to talk him into using medication or not—either he'll be drugged, judgment in tatters, unfit for company, or else the pain will be dogging him with every step, every movement.
Oh, Bruce. And Alfred! And Bruce. I love them so much. And Diana, too. You write her so wonderfully, calm and patient and wise and still so very no-bullshit. Also, I am ridiculous, but Alfred and Diana exchange a glance made me go :DDDDDD.
Having lied to Clark for weeks, months, and then telling him now, at the precise moment when he's most likely to feel like he owes Batman something; as if that bullet were a chip to bargain with, as if Clark's gratitude could be cashed in on. The thought alone puts a sick sour taste in the back of Bruce's throat.
Oh, BRUCE. Any normal person would think this is a good moment, but not him, of course not. Bruce not wanting to let Clark forgive him because he knows he doesn't deserve it, even if Clark would be kind enough to do it. Man, this is wonderful, so twisted and fucked up, but it still makes sense in itself and it's so very Bruce. <3 And the ending of that first scene, ouch! Bruce thinking about "sacrificing" Bruce Wayne in all of this, making sure that Clark won't miss him, thinking about all of this like it's still a plan he's in any way in control of. And the beginning of the following scene is just so great, Bruce basically treating himself like some puppet following directions, playing a part he has to play.
AND IT'S JUST PHYSICALLY PAINFUL, BRUCE BEING ALL AWFUL TO CLARK IN HIS BRUCE WAYNE-Y WAY. D: My heart! Poor Clark. Especially with Clark trying so hard not to inconvenience or bother him.
"Look, it was nice for a while, okay? But this is starting to add up to more trouble than it's worth."
Holy shit, Bruce, you're horrid. And the extremely enjoyable assets and BORING and OUCH. Bruce. :( And the more he says, the worse it gets. Wow, this is painful, even knowing that he doesn't mean it. Maybe even more so because he doesn't mean it.
(Forgiveness is what Bruce wants. He can admit that. But anger—anger's what he's earned. Anger is what's coming to him; and he has no one to blame but himself.)
"Suit yourself," Bruce says easily, as if it makes no difference.
NONNY, YOU'RE MAKING ME CRY. STOP MAKING ME CRY!
Clark stares at him like—like Bruce is someone he's never seen before, like he's found a stranger looking out at him from Bruce's face. NOOOOOOOOO, my heart! You're stomping all over it! And then this: "No. I think maybe I did." He takes one slow breath in, lets it out, and then says at a more normal volume, "Sorry for interrupting that phone call. I hope it wasn't too big an inconvenience." ALL OF THIS HURTS SO MUCH!
And, oh, plot twist! :D I love Bruce finding out things he needs to know while still being as obnoxiously Bruce Wayne about it as necessary.
"I'm going to tell you to please not ask me that," Bruce says, with a wink. "And one other thing, if you would: close your eyes."
Bruuuuuuuuuuce. Now I'm just having a big fangirl moment here. :D Which was necessary to cheer me up after SO MUCH HEARTBREAK. This is utterly perfect. Just, wow. You really know how to break my heart into so many little pieces and I'm just so glad I know you're going to fix it again because THIS HURT SO MUCH. Bruce was so awful in such a perfect Bruce way because ~it needs to be done~. Ouch. I can't wait for the next part, I am so excited. :D /OP